Want A Better Future? This Break-Up App Might Help...

When Paul Simon wrote his classic song, "50 Ways To Leave Your Lover" back in 1975, smartphones had yet to be invented.  However, had he written it recently, he could have included a line to the effect of, "Just tap on the app, Chap..." as one of the means of easily escaping a failed romance...

Granted, breakups have been brutal throughout all of recorded history...
(Image courtesy pinterest.com.)

According to live105.cbslocal.com, the cowards and the careless of the dating world can now dispose of their woes thanks to a new app.   For everyone who goes overboard on dating apps and now needs to hit "delete" on humans in real life, the Binder app is willing to send a "Dear John" or "Dear Jane" letter, without you even having to discuss your disgust with your mismatched mate.

"Bin" as in slang for "waste bin."  Like, where their feelings will be after this.
(Image courtesy play.google.com.)

All Binder requires is your prospective ex's name, gender, and phone number, and your relationship is already gone like the Eagles song.  Well, actually, the message IS partially delivered in song, namely in the form of a pre-recorded Scottish man intoning a heartfelt remembrance of the good times:  “Your {lover} doesn’t love you anymore, {s}he hates your face, {s}he thinks you’re a bore,” he sings. “In fact he is sick in his mouth whenever he sees you around.”

Binder's motto, "It's time they got the message", really says it all.  You can choose to add excuses, ranging in brutality from "pretty mean" to "if you said that to my face, your face would no longer exist."

Maybe it's just better to walk out the back, Jack.
(Image courtesy cbslive105.wordpress.blogs.com.)

An option to Tweet or Facebook the decision adds to the social horror you can inflict on a particularly unpleasant partner.  Because what good is a shaming if the news can't be spread?

Binder is available for Android and iOS downloads via their website.  As Simon said, "There's no need to be coy, Roy"...but you might want to watch your back for a bit if you throw this ice-bucket of an app at your former flame.

But when you finally do leave your tech toys for another device, let them down easy.
They were so good to you, for so long.
(Image courtesy iphonelife.com.)

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