Does Mario Dream Of Electric Sheep? Nintendo To Create Sleep-Monitoring Device

Do you wake up sometimes wondering if you're just unhappy to be headed to work, or if you're actually experiencing sleep deprivation?  Do you wonder about how your sleep cycles are affected by various activities you may be hitting up before you hit the sack?  Soon, a device made by (stop laughing) Nintendo will be able to help you determine how healthy your sleep patterns are.

According to, Nintendo's president, Satoru Iwata, isn't just talking about a novelty invention.  This is a whole new means of categorizing a previously-unquantified issue that affects every human on earth.  "Since fatigue per se is not regarded as a disease in the medical world, it is said to be a field where sufficient research has yet to be conducted," Iwata said. "We have been fortunate to encounter several experts who have been conducting cutting-edge research in the science of fatigue. Together, we are now developing technology to estimate fatigue."

Optional dream-controlling hopefully to follow.
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The device, as reported by Reuters, is as of yet unnamed but is planned to debut in 2015.  Developed in conjunction with the medical device company ResMed, the sleep-assessment system will be small enough to easily sit on your nightstand.  Using microwave sensors that do not come into contact with the body, the quality and length of sleep cycles are tracked and then sent to attendant apps for analysis.

This creation is part of Nintendo's new "Quality Of Life" initiative, which according to seeks to "improve peoples' quality of life in enjoyable ways."  The new sleeping device will abide by five simple principles:  it need not be worn by the user, it need not touch the user at all, it need not be booted up by the user to begin working (it assesses things like body movement, heartbeat and breathing autonomously to determine sleep cycles), it provides data immediately, and it requires no complicated setup.

In other words, it's as easy as falling asleep!  And if you can't even do that right, Nintendo's new machine can help you.

If you get a good night's sleep, maybe you can work your way up to Player 1 status.
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